Never not been a douchebag.

He has said many times "I was a late bloomer". I have honestly never heard that in reference to a male other than from him. It usually has to do with chicks not getting their period, or not growing tits until like 17

This is what Opie does, he hears some phrase or description once in his life that he somehow relates to himself out of narcissism, and then walks around his whole life describing himself like that to everyone. Since he has money and a show apparently no one ever tells him he is a complete ass.

He thought that a cock tease is when you rub your cock on a girl, teasing her.

this can't possibly be true

If those words were spoken I must ask for a link

Same thing with his "baby weight." He's used that unironically several times.

He was also a "late bloomer" in the sense that he didn't learn how to differentiate saying his p's and b's until about age 45.

He still struggles with E's and U's, Merry and Very are Murray and Vury, and Murray becomes Merry... That week long beach boys saga is when I "Tapped out" of the show. I honestly thought Brian Wilsons dad was name "Merry" until at hour 2 of day 3, Jim finally got annoyed and politely told him, whilst dancing around Gregg-shells, "His name is Murray"... "Yeah, you're right, what did I say?"... you said "Merry" 300 fucking times!

I wont even shit on him for that one because many white New Yorkers of lower-stock say that. As well as "I seen that" and the one that particularly ruffles my feathers (pardon the language) "So don't I" when they are agreeing with you. "I love that new ____" ... "Yeah man, so don't I". What the fuck does that even mean?

I thought I was the only one that was enraged by these things. This is it. I finally belong.

Well i'm recovering from a broken jaw at the moment, then I have to do a year in jail (the judge temporarily adjourned my sentencing due to my health concerns, also I'm not a flight risk) I have an absurd criminal history though, no Uncle Paul shit, just a culmination of general douchebaggery and a couple new felonies. Can we still be friends? Also when i wake up, I will question why I got 10 downvotes on this post, and why the fuck was Sugarland the last video I watched on youtube? Mysteries are fuckin great gentleman

whats on your rap sheet?

Well my life is a shame-spiral... I got A couple DWI's, 3 "disorderly conducts" which are basically tickets, and a generic charge a cop can give out if someone argues with them. Menacing in the 2nd, Class A misdemeanor, which is threatening bodily harm with a weapon, everything from a pencil to a hand-grenade (it was knife). Also a couple "Harrasment" charges from fights, because they had no evidence or cooperating witnesses to charge me with assault. I'm neither cool or tough (currently have a broken jaw) just a raging alcoholic/asshole

you're a shitheel... goooooooooooooood for you

I believe that horseshit comes from broadcast school. They teach you to say b's instead of p's so you don't blow into the microphone or something, i dont know, I heard this somewhere.

I think that's what the mic screens are for

I know, but I swear I heard someone, I believe it was Jimmy, say on a podcast thats why Opie does that.

The great Dennis Falcone has perfect godlike diction.

i'm gonna venture to say you're absolutely and unequivocally wrong on this one.

in no way is that a good explanation for that because all p words would be affected. and he had to fight saying boout with every fiber of his being as if it was hardwiring of who he is.

Not saying it might not be true, but I 100% heard Jimmy say this on a podcast, might have been berts.

i'm sure he said it, but it's just a lousy explanation. that's really jim restructuring the world around him to make it more palatable than to see his friend and coworker as a mush-mouthed boob.

Somebody order a hat removal?

Hopefully by one of those swarthy ISIS gentleman

Topical

Niiiice....

Preferably by a winter caretaker in a Colorado hotel.

Lifelong hack.

Did people ever wear those hats that high? I remember smaller knit caps but this seems absurd.

Absurd is what the Opster does...didn't you know he's a PSYCHO? We're talking about the guy who wore a human bone necklace!

Nerds.

Black people used to, but stopped when they saw how absurd it looked when white people started doing it.

Pretty sure they stopped the day this picture was taken.

In all honestly, it was the 90s....although Op was too old to be wearing a hat like that back then as much as he's too old to be wearing pre torn jeans now

Also, if you truly grew up "poor" and had to wear hand me downs and shitty clothes, why as an adult would you wear clothes that come already half destroyed? He's 54 and rich, maybe try dressing like a successful adult?

Not when your wife picks out your clothes for you. Imagine a conversation in the Hughes household. "Greg! You have to start dressing better" "B-b-but I'm a cool grunge guy, I don't wanna!" "Well fine, look, I've found some nice stores that sell that kind of stuff but it looks nice!" "Foiiiiiiiiine....I guess this is pretty cool"

You don't like his $100 ripped jeans and his $200 pre-distressed sneakers. What about his "vintage" t-shirts?

I'm 24 and Opie dresses like I used to in my sophomore year of high school

What a shithead. I hate this man.

"Check out the empties man!"

-The Opester

Where's his shitty hippy necklace to complete the douche look

Mad guy coming

So rad

Awesome resolution.

Not when your wife picks out your clothes for you. Imagine a conversation in the Hughes household. "Greg! You have to start dressing better" "B-b-but I'm a cool grunge guy, I don't wanna!" "Well fine, look, I've found some nice stores that sell that kind of stuff but it looks nice!" "Foiiiiiiiiine....I guess this is pretty cool"

He still struggles with E's and U's, Merry and Very are Murray and Vury, and Murray becomes Merry... That week long beach boys saga is when I "Tapped out" of the show. I honestly thought Brian Wilsons dad was name "Merry" until at hour 2 of day 3, Jim finally got annoyed and politely told him, whilst dancing around Gregg-shells, "His name is Murray"... "Yeah, you're right, what did I say?"... you said "Merry" 300 fucking times!

I believe that horseshit comes from broadcast school. They teach you to say b's instead of p's so you don't blow into the microphone or something, i dont know, I heard this somewhere.

Not saying it might not be true, but I 100% heard Jimmy say this on a podcast, might have been berts.