opie: that's the beauty of us, we can do whatever the fuck we want.

jim: it's a wild show

Norton is defeated.

At 0:50 when he says "...yea, it's a wild show." You can just hear it...Jimmy's at rock bottom

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I have a feeling he scratches the number of days he's in studio like an Alcatraz prisoner from the 40s

He just signed another 2 year contract.

Scratching dollar signs then

And that's all we got on that

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1IaVy3-ezlA&t=4m0s

You didn't have shit on it Opie YOU DID NOT have to move on. You just felt left out . boo hooo

The irony is Norton is actually not a John for once, he's the prostitute.

Yup. Jimmy does not like Jelly Tits at all, that much is clear from this audio.

It might come to the point where Jim can no longer tolerate Opie for the paychecks; thus he relapses and gets shit-faced drunk, comes into the studio without sleeping after a night-long binge of picking up trannies, then verbally destroys Opie on-air before cutting himself and threatening to commit suicide while sobbing uncontrollably and confessing that he really is gay (which we all already knew).

That was so sad.

"I was out and about, doin my thing, I didn't have time" Go kill yourself.

I think people are missing that Sir Isaac jelly tits ignored what jim said. Opie is worse than Fez. Fez has a character, or is a character. Opie has nothing but the eclectic village of retards he exploits. Now that he got rid of the retards it's clear that he is a weak link. Even more so than the mentally challenged homeless people he tries to milk fame out of.

Probably the funniest thing opie's said in months, albeit unintentionally.

This deserves to be permanently stickied at the top of this subreddit for all of eternity.

I agree

This is literally THE funniest original thing any user has ever posted in this sub.

"I'm absolutely crying over here"

Through your tears....

He came from Long Island with two bad bits...

And what happened?

Did you HOWL?

I was fucking howling and then I mic'd it and pitched it up 5 octaves so I could be howlin' along with the Opester.

That was IN color, you were watching?

Agreed

What blathering nothingness. I feel so sad.

Holy shit is that good, please make it a regular thing! It's absolutely perfect.

I gave O&J a chance earlier today with this episode while I was laying flooring but had to turn it off because Opie got me to the point where I was cursing at the speakers. I came here to see if anyone else was as annoyed as me with some of the things and then I find this, wow.

Every time I try to give it a listen I can't do it.

If you would rather lay floor in silence than listen to oqie...yikes.

Were you "losing your mind"?

Hey, I didn't hear Vos and Bonnie's show.... were they also "losing their minds"?

I'd listen to a whole show of this.

That was the greatest...Jimmy sounds like he's just exhausted with that insufferable hole.

Holy shit, it's obvious that everyone around the show hates him now

"They wanted me to call in but I was... uh... out and about doing my thing!"

What a cunt.

Any time he generalizes something like this it means that nothing happened. He was just sitting at home yesterday doing nothing, that's what "doing his thing" is. Just like when he said he picked up 2 black chicks by "you know, just being me" it meant that it didn't happen.

"he said he picked up 2 black chicks by "you know, just being me""

Please tell me that's not real.

Sorry I think maybe my comment made it sound like I meant he picked up 2 black girls at once (for a threesome). He just, as he put it, "went black twice". But he never had "penis going into vagina" (what you and I might call "sex") with a black girl. The whole thing is so blatantly made up it's just absurd. He brings it up totally uninvited, and then hesitates and says "uhh..." when anyone asks him anything about it, gets this really sheepish voice, can't get his facts straight, all the while reminding you that it happened so long ago that he doesn't remember all the details. It's almost a cartoonish parody of someone telling a fake story - like Steve Carrell at the beginning of the 40 year old virgin - "I'd be nailing her, and she'd be like 'OH you're nailing me!'".

The actual line is around 11:40, but the lies start at 5:28 which this should link to:

http://youtu.be/PVCNPCIy3fU?t=5m28s

And I said this elsewhere the day it aired, but just to reiterate:

Opie is such a pathetic loser that he came in his pants in a story he made up.

phenomenal

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Do dooo do do

This is all going to come crashing down at some point. I can't wait to hear it.

This is the only reason I still check this sub. I know one of these days, there will be a headline saying "it finally happened".

Your ability to capture everything wrong with the show and make it as funny as possible has me in a state of awe

http://i.imgur.com/byNQEY5.jpg

oh my god. The show is so much worse like this. I realize now, that all I like about the O&J show besides Jimmy is literally the SOUND of Opie's voice. Because NO substance comes out of it. It must be because it reminds me of the old O&A show and all those hours of great radio his voice was a part of. My mind is tricking me into thinking I like Opie when really I am subconsciously waiting for Anthony to chime in with something actually good.

I had the same realization. Forced to focus on the content of what he's saying, it's a whole new level of realization of how terrible he is.

holy fuck you're right.

"...Yeah, it's a wild show." LOL. Norton's genuine disgust.

I'm all in with high voiced Opie. Jimmy sounds so uninterested.

Haha, that's gold

Bravo

Fuck, that really emphasizes his shitty falsetto whine when the bass disappears. He will probably sound like that all the time when he gets older.

Older than 63?

thanks for the blow by blow of creating this audio gold

If someone printed a transcript of this 2 minute clip, I'd fall asleep reading it

The other day someone posted a transcription like this, and it was god-awful.

"Out and about doin' my thing!!" (going to power yoga, picking the kids up from soccer, going to a PTA meeting, lunching over grilled chicken salads, changing a tampon)

Source: I'm a lady and that's our thing

Go clean a toilet, Opie

Opie is such a goddamn woman.

Ho-ly shit.

Jee-sus Christ.

Son-of a bitch.

Nig-ga puh-lease

This is the fucking best.

That's funny but where did you pull the clips of Julia Child from?

You win the internet this week.

Just plowing through.

It's like oqie is looking around the room saying "This is funny. We're funny."

Kudos, my friend.

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Really not all that far off from his high voice that he does. Fucking titted man.

So many moments in this, holy shit. Every line is gold.

This gets better with every listen "Whats goin on Jimmy!"

Any classic bit Opie stepped on needs this treatment.

I can't wait to faintly hear a high-pitched Opie saying "Good morning, CCR" on Jimmy's phone on the show in the next week or so

WOOOOOOW..Please sir. Another!

That really was beautiful but still, I'm annoyed that, while you tell us how you got Opie's voice to sound like that you don't tell us what effects you put on Jim's voice to make it sound like he really doesn't want to be there, hates sitting across from this blithering idiot and is constantly screaming insults toward Opie inside his mind.

Holy fuck, this is great. Thank you for your service.

Jimmy's voice is exactly the voice I have when I'm talking to my dad.

I liked Creedence until I heard this.

Jimmy is just as bad as the Hole. He's been in show business for like over 20 years and he still clinging to this sinking ship for a paycheck. He knows this show is shit but doesn't have the self respect as an artist to leave. Which is fine, keep getting them checks! But his opinianated jimmy rants where he calls out the media and others hold no weight now, he's just as bad as them.

If this was done to every show, I may consider listening again.

Holy shit, this is brilliant.

This. Is. Amazing

Me: "Not my gumdrop buttons"

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Fucking genius. If Opie had 10% of the creativity and humor of the people on this sub, he'd almost be listenable.

dats fawkin funny

Jesus Christ that's fucking funny, I spat out my coffee laughing TWICE!

"It's a wild show."

this is brilliant.

Opie Mouse

He sounds like David from Isreal

This is fantastic!

Uncomfortable music talk leading nowhere. Opie is such a hack.

This is as brilliant as it is infuriating. Fucking well done!

I have to mention that I listen to a short O&J Clip from just a couple days ago I think, maybe you guys can fill in the blanks. I quick remembered why I haventistened to his show since Ant left! I don't know why I let it, but I was so fucking pissed at hearing that pussy speak!

Opie was supposed to call into someone's Podcast that evening, but he blew it off. So the Podcast peoe called Opie repeatedly but he hid. The fucking money shit of this story is this. This motherfucker works 12 Hours a week if I'm not mistaken. Clothes are brought to his house for shopping, they have a chef, a maid, a nanny so they don't have to speak to their kids. Neither one of those two wortess fuck do shit!

Opie said he didn't call the Podcast because he wanted some alone time because "He is always so fucking busy, he never had two minutes to himself"!! 12 Hours a week sitting in a chair spilling out incoherent sentences that make no since for 3 Hours a day. How does he find time to live his life?

A show with 2 holes and a Sam is just bound to make it big.

Fucking amazing.

this is fantastic

Bravo, sir. Bravo.

I can't quite place why, but the tone of "THIS'S A LOT OF CLIPS!" at 1:23 cracks me up consistently.

This is gold. Jimmy sounds so annoyed.

Holy shit this is genius.

Oh boy....

…

yeah...

high-pitch opie - the newest wack packer

This is awesome, but it sounds like high-pitched Oqie is biting down on gauze after a root canal

Lol man this is well done and funny as fuck. Can't stop playing it. I die every time he says we can do whatever the fuck we want and jim says yeah it's a wild show. Wow

If you wanted to highlight how fucking AWFUL the show is now you did a fantastic job of it. I'm simultaneously angry at how bad that was and extremely glad I haven't tuned in sinced they announced re-signing. Holy shit.

Opie sounds like Whitey from the Adam Sandler albums.

High-Pitch Opie - the newest Wack Packer

At this point, I have to wonder why Opie hasn't killed himself.

He's too dumb to realize how shitty he and his show are. It's why retards don't get depressed. Ignorance is bliss.

All that's left is for them to get plastic surgery and start wearing makeup.

Goddamn was this good. Could one also do this in Pro Tools by just knocking Opie's voice up or down a couple of semitones?

What's the deal with O-Q-I-O? & R-A-Q-I-O?? I missed something.

The letters in the logo make it look like a lowercase q on radio so everyone is shitting on it since it came out, as they should. It's a garbage logo.

Thanks

Opie the strong independent black woman, we all knew he could be.

lmao I can't stop laughing at this

Done dead

That was absolutely one of the funniest things I've heard in recent memory. What program did you use to do this?

After so many years doing jocktober and sarcastically pretending he's on a horribly unfunny show, jim seems to have slipped into a PTSD flashback here. That "it's a wild show" shot was 100% freudian. I bet he felt hot and cold at the same time after he delivered it.

AMAZING

"We can do whatever the FUCK we want!" Yep, except for something CRAZY like a most offensive song contest.

lmao please do this again, it's incredible. It's like a mirror of truth

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holy shit. I'm not even an Opie hater, but that is funny

How's the rest of the Philly crew

um, this was fucking hilarious. kudos. finally something original.

Opie is trolling everyone. I get that he's not smart but he's been playing this idiot character for a while. He is acting this way to annoy people and it's obviously working.

Opie Kaufman?

That's the BIT, you stupid FUCK

I've honestly considered that this may be true 0 only because I can't imagine somebody being as humorless and as tone deaf as Opie.

I figured you guys would down vote that for no reason. Quit listening to the show if you hate it so much cunts. I've never heard a bigger bunch of crying bitches in my life.

It wasn't for no reason. You just wheeled out the same tired 'Thats the bit' excuse used by Opie-Apologists. It is, like your idol, hack.

What's hack is you cry babies complaining about a show you don't have to listen to. He's the same person he's always been and you guys are beating a dead horse.

Why does people complaining about something bother you so much? Is it because it fills you with self-doubt to think something you like might actually suck?

Man up, Scoonshells. Try actually having some self-confidence in your own tastes for once, and not feeling like other people's opinions of a show are a direct criticism of your worth as a person.

A bit presumptuous aren't you? I'm not bothered, I'm amused. You guys sit and talk about Opie like you are on the view. Just curious, why do you listen to the show?

Why did they listen to Scorch? In this, you will find your answer. Any further complaints is the talk of a simple hater.

How long have you been listening?

A billion years.

Well you are a real fucking idiot then. Would you watch Scorch and then complain about it? Now go cry about something else loser.

The only one who seems to be crying here is you sweetheart ;)

And what happened?