Dear pests: I started a community on this message board site in honor of this new web show I've been watching. I was super stoked when the host of said show started posting on my message board! Not wanting to upset the host, I started removing negative and hateful posts in an effort to keep him happy. Now the members of my community have found out and revolted on me sending horrible pictures of large black men's genitals and deformed infants to my twitter. I made the community private so now one can browse anymore. Am I a quay?

More like a queeb

Or a qway.

I do know one thing: Keep your head up, because you're on the fast track to a pool-side seat at the next compound party!

Are you a southern pig boy molested throughout youth and now seeking real power of your own?

/u/username76567 is actually /u/pekingoose

You lose. Good day, sir.

/u/Hahrrgis is actually /a/faggot

Now guys, let's NOT make fun of people.

you couldn't even laugh at that? it was a good bit

I was quoting one of those generic "hole" lines they used to play as clips on the show. Faggot always makes me chuckle

Upvos's for everyone.

naw, that guy's got 4,749 comment karma. I used to have -300 around here. lol.

I wonder why

Dear pests: I really had to think about getting involved here at all, but here's a long poorly thought out paragraph. I need 10,000 dollars to produce something nobody wants but nobody will give me any because I am close to their radio GOD!! I'm HIS BLOOD, his big bro, his oldest friend, confidante, supporter, protector, counciller, drinking buddy, band mate, lawyer, cleaner, chef, university lecturer, husband etc... You will never get to come in to bed with us AND ITS INFURIATING TO YOU!!!! Me and Anthybabe had a little chat and touch and he said that you are everything wrong with this world. Don't you realize that? I WILL BE A SUCKCESS!!!!!

Anyhows, how should I go about getting this $10,000?

Dear pests: My sister asked me to purchase a frozen cheesecake, cookies or pretzel dough from my nephew for his school fundraiser.

I told her that I would send a donation directly to the program because I was not interested in the items.

My sister pushed the frozen cookies, and I told her that I did not want to be bullied into purchasing an item that I did not want. She told me that my nephew did not want a donation; he wanted 10 orders so he could win a watch. She also stated that she would tell my nephew that I was on a special diet and could not order anything (which is not true).

My mother called and asked to place an order (in my name) to ease the tension. I said, "No, I will give a donation and purchase the watch for the boy."

I wanted to directly invest in my nephew, so I sent a letter and donation to his school. Any advice?

Tell those two cunts to mind their own fucking business.

I'll invest in your nephew tssk tssk

Go to Walmart and buy him a $10 watch. Buy a bag of pretzels.

If you're older than 10 then no buying or eating cookies.

Dear Pests: I'm a "retired" police officer from Long Island. Recently, I have been spending more and more time with a close male friend. I think I am ready to take our relationship to the next level. How do I ask politely if he would like my oral favors?

Thanks

BRO JOB BRO JOB CHOO CHOO

Dear Pests: I have a razor blade and a bottle of bleach...How do I make the pain go away?

How do you guys usually respond to a thorough cucking?