Roland's New Segment Ideas

12  2014-08-14 by chipppper

I'll start with:

Poke Fatty With a Stick

25 comments

"Fill the noose"?

Roland's "Box of Dicks."

In this segment, Roland climbs into a cardboard box, and then Jim Norton pushes the box out the window. Random people on the street are horrified to find a cardboard box full of dick on the street.

Roland vs Gravity.

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Roland's Suicide Challenge

Poke Fatty With a Stick sword

Throw Porky from the Train

Ends with him going feet first into the wood-chipper

The "whirrrrr" of the machinery interspersed with the "heeheehee" giggle mutated into a horrifying shriek...

A faint "what's that?" can be heard over the noise.

Man vs. Food: A Battle to the Death.

"Super Colon Shred with Dr. Ian Smith's popcorn enema"

They bring a forklift into the studio, turn Roland upside down and funnel unpopped corn kernels down his b-hole through diesel-soaked traffic cones

And then put him over a spit til the kernels pop.

Put a cyanide capsule in five out of six cronuts and make him eat them all.

Remember how Gaddafi died? (Being beaten and mocked by a mob of rabid Libyan rebels). Yeah, that.

Don't forget the knife in the b-hole.

"Losing weight with Roland.....oh wait now I'm just going to call myself a foodie so I don't have to lose weight never mind"

Make Sam tit fuck Roland with his awful dick while "Loves the Internet Guy" cheers them on.

Holy fuck that is brutal.

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I was thinking a play off the wiffleball bat challenge might be good. Except replace the pussy with Rolands throat and replace the bat with a sword.

"Give the Fatty An Infarction" - all they need is a treadmill, and a cronut to lure him onto it and keep moving.

"Piano box coffin fitting with Roland"

Pin the carbon monoxide cartridge on the CPAP

A whaffer thin mint.

Roland's Razor Blades and AIDS Blood Extravaganza

Bacon grease and heavy cream challenge.

Roland drinks bacon grease and heavy cream milkshakes until he drops dead of a massive coronary.

The payoff is the ah haahaaaahaahahahahaaa thats terrific soundclip as he death convulses.

You want a viral video poopster? I just gave it to you.

The Baseball Bat Challenge

It's like the wiffle ball bat challenge but it mainly involves beating Roland with a fucking baseball bat

This errr.....this thread, and your posters.... you're all such pedestrianAYEEEEEE HEEEEEEE HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE