jury duty

"and then the OTHER lawyer fell out of the closet vomiting all over us and...." Yikes!

"And he fell on the stenographer, breaking her in half"

No brutha-man, you're out of order!

That muthahucka

"I used to work for some of doze guys." "I wasn't one of dem, but I was one of them. You know what I mean? They looked out for me like I was one of their own."

Caddy = being in the mob

Mob Caddy starring Cedric the Entertainer coming soon...

Tyler Perry presents Madea in "Club you and yo mafia too!", rated R.

Rated N

Who can forget the time when Opie got a ticket for not wearing his seat belt? He was so upset that he had to step outside and figh the air, and then even circled back looking for the officer after dropping his son off. Sadly he didn't find him. I bet he would have had a few choice words for that cop I tell ya! Link

I totally forgot about this one - it's one of the best examples of his child-like lying. But it occurred to me - is there any chance he's telling the truth about stupid shit like this? He's absolutely a drama queen half wit (and I don't care if that's the bit) so I can almost see him getting out of a car and fighting the air, or similar dumbness.

I think there's truth in that he got a ticket and was annoyed. I don't believe he got out of his car or crumpled up the ticket and threw it out the window.

when he said bam margera didn't fuck his wife?

The Candy Kid story takes the cake, IMHO.

I cringed into the shape of a jumbo skrimp

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This is pretty embarrassing. You can even feel that Tucker Max vibe in the room.

I love how Ant barely says anything during the whole story.

Or most of Opies stories like this. Back in the day they would really interact. Now Ant is just like "yeah?" a few times and then a titter at one point and tries to run out the clock.

Everyone on the show is just resigned to working as easily with one another as possible now - no real interaction or personal feelings. That's why it's so easy for everyone to say, "Yep, we all have fun, and it's relaxed and great." It's because nobody really gives a shit on a personal level.

"i don't even know how i got outta it" yes. it's completely apparent you don't know how to get outta this lie.

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Putting up numbers.

for real lol he looked like the biggest weenie back in his younger years.

That time when he said a black guy broke into his house and went close to his face saw he was a guy and ran away

"The neeeegro"

"N-person"

Pretty much the only story that isn't bullshit is the time he kicked a dog to death for eating his unattended steak.

Poor Chester :(

Never forget

when he said he was a bookie for one of his high school teachers. when asked how he got out of it, there was no answer. this dude is a fucking piece of shit.

He has so many stories about growing up poor ring that false when he also talks about big family vacations. He's also referred to their lakehouse and how they never bought store brands. Fine, he wasn't well-off growing up, but his stories don't bear out claims of growing up poor.

Now I wasn't destitute but growing up I pretty much universially ate Spam because thats what we could afford.

So all his "growing up poor" stories just ring of such BULLSHIT! to me, and him carrying his lunch to school in a cement bag with concrete dust stuck to his sandwich?

(Fargo Voice) "FUCKING LIAR!"

I recall him saying that he was so poor he could only afford to order pizzas to eat!

Dude when I was a kid I lived in Dallas, and going to FUCKING MCDONALDS was like a special treat, like dad got a bonus so we get to eat out tonight at Mc'y Ds.

And eating at Cici's Pizza? Might as well have been the fucking four seasons.

I had forgotten that pizza detail, now im certain of it, hes a fucking liar.

Those seem legit to me

He was so poor they had to eat Pepperidge Farms bread, which is like 4x more expensive than the regular white bread he claims was a real treat when he went to friends' houses. He actually used that as an example of how he was "extremely poor." Direct quote "Extremely Poor."

Oh and his mom made them search for a blue comb once, so he can relate to Darrell Hammond's abuse.

Opie IS the "me me me" person he always complains about.

The day he tried to relate to Darryl hammonds abuse is when I jumped on the Opie hate boat.

In less than 15 minutes people already have 4 different stories; just to show you the type of person we have to deal with while listening to the show

"The type of person we have to deal with"

Sounds a little over dramatic don't you think?

Nah it sounds undadramatic asumpthin tss

Wait, wait, wait... I was gonna say.....I was gonna say that one time when he stepped on a homeless man's dessert.

Mine was an Anthony story.

You could just not listen

His dad started his own religion so he didn't have to pay taxes.

He has so many classic fake stories. Every jocktober type radio personality has a plethora of their goto fake stories from their life. Opie is just like them.

When they interviewed Roger Daltrey, Opie came in the next day and claimed that he ran into Roger in Central Park right after the interview but Roger didn't recognize him.

I just remember listening to the way he told that story and knew that he was lying.

Also, I have never bought the story where a shit nugget rolled down his leg then hit his toe and rolled over the doorstep while he was standing at the door saying goodbye to his girlfriends parents.

I got a nice piece. Not when I was younger. But I got a nice piece now. Nice piece.

This came after people started joking about how Ant must have a huge cock. Opie has never been one to let himself feel left out so of course he starts saying out of nowhere with no prompt at all "I got a nice piece...I'm doing pretty good down there yeah I got a nice cock"

Sam probably has a bigger winky

Insert every first break of a monday show.

When the black people got in front of his car and yelled "OBAMA PRESIDENT NAH!" I think that was just totally not real.

That was Ant's story. I believe it.

For a guy who films goddamn every mundane thing that happens to him in hopes of going viral, he sure lacks proof of any of these stories. His life is so uneventful that he resorted to getting an unfunny fat lady to be loud in burger king and pretend to be scared of automatic doors to try to go viral. If any of this shit from the last 5 years actually happened he would have tweeted the video of it every day since.

Apparently Perez Hilton stole his video and took his intro of or something? I think that was the only Opie complaining break I enjoyed because it hurt him so much to lose those sweet sweet views.

The very first story he told on WNEW was a lie, don't you remember? Hanging out with his "roller blading buds" in Central Park, fans stopping him in the street just to share their excitement over O&A's "big return" to radio? So embarrassing.

No good story starts with..."So I was roller-blading"

Not true.

"So I was roller blading, and that's when Neo Nazis jumped out from behind the trees and cut my Achilles Tendons."

How bout' so we was roller-knifin' or sumfin like that ts.

In his defense, that really came out when they joctobered themselves. Opie himself admitted what a fake douche he was being back then. Say what you want, but he has improved greatly.

back then? can we get some present day confession?

http://www.reddit.com/r/opieandanthony/comments/21q1gj/pump_it_up_for_the_show_opie_stories/

more for posterity, i was a bit disappointed by the offerings because everytime opie shares it's suspect

And that's my biggest problem with him, honestly. Every time he shares a story where something "wacky" happens, I now always just assuming he's making it up. From listening to the show all of these years they've made it real easy to spot when someone is lying or embellishing and when he tries to do it, it is immediately apparent. Maybe he thought that coming back from break he needed something to talk about and assumed that fans would be bored to hear that everything went fine and he had a nice relaxing vacation without any hiccups. Instead he has to find someone he can say "FUCK YOU!" to and he knows that airlines are an easy target because it's easy to believe that they would do something shitty. I don't know obviously, but as much as Opie brags about how honest the show is, he sure seems to "pump things up" a lot.

The show has clearly just passed you by

Go listen to Howard

Yeah baby-boy did da show be MEAN ta you? Oh baby-boy go wisten to howard

You STUPID FUUUUCCCCCKKKKK, dats da bit! You dont get the bit! The show has passed you by!

Good riddance, I hope I'm not as retarded as they are at 50+ yrs old.

One that comes to mind is most of the stories with his mother. I'm willing to bet she wasn't nearly as bad as he portrays her.

When he said that he was friends with Steve C. They hates each other

When he had jury service and made every one laugh ....

you could just limit it to "made everyone laugh"

Stickin' it to man baby that's how the philly crew do it.

Greg Mitty Hughes

Oh you know that calls for a full movie movie poster treatment...

New sidebar

During the abominable Mexico flight train wreck, he said that he memorised the American national anthem and practises it regularly in anticipation of the authorities questioning his American citizenship. He then proceeded to say 'I really do that. (fake laugh). I swear to god!'.

Returning the wallet

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I was just thinking about this the other day. For me it's fighting the French guy under water while scuba diving. I remember thinking that story was hilarious at the time. I guess I was a little more naive. If it were today I'd cringe the whole way through.

I seriously doubt he's ever punched anyone. In his stories he's a real confrontational tough guy, but in his videos and on the show it's clear that he's completely passive aggressive.

Maybe we should get Troy Quan in here to comment, or is he to busy pushing girlfriends off cliffs

Edit:spelling

You were one "f" short of a punchline.

I'm not loying.

The only time I really remember listening and thinking the story seemed like a lie or at least embellished was his last jury duty assignment.

I just heard a whopper... his kid exclaiming about how big his penis was in the bathroom. From anyone else, I might believe it. Stop trying to sell it!

anytime he talks about music. Nothing funnier than coming back from commercial with a song and Opie says how big a fan he is of that band and he gets the band wrong

Used to be all in with the Cake, big time.

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That he forgot about Maria Menounos' laugh.

This thread is great. I'd forgotten a lot of these. He really does suck.

When he said that Lynsi isnt a gold digger

If you believe any story that any of them tell on the show, you're an idiot.

"I was not influenced by Howard Stern" 6-2-2014

Aww Guitar hero still listens. Kinda deflates your "i've been off the show for 14 months and you still think of me" argument.

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When he said he held a baby lion in Mexico. Wait...

Mine was an Anthony story.

"The type of person we have to deal with"

Sounds a little over dramatic don't you think?

Wait, wait, wait... I was gonna say.....I was gonna say that one time when he stepped on a homeless man's dessert.

You could just not listen

Mob Caddy starring Cedric the Entertainer coming soon...

"N-person"

for real lol he looked like the biggest weenie back in his younger years.