Life was pretty good after college. I’d moved down to Florida with my best friend, and my girlfriend followed soon after. We married four years later. For nine years, we were a model couple. We seldom fought, started building careers, dug ourselves out of debt, and settled in to start a family. We were the pair that our friends looked up to and wanted to emulate. I’d never felt so happy, loved, and secure in my life.

I wonder how true this is...

Then, two weeks after we became pregnant with our first child, she told me we were divorcing. She refused to participate in any counseling, and demanded that I sign the divorce papers or she would have me served. No warning, no signs of trouble, no money problems, no infidelity, nothing.

I wonder if the alcoholism, misogyny, and careless spending on star wars toys could have contributed to this...

I pleaded with her, begged for the life we’d built together, and for the life growing in her belly.

This statement made me spit out my drink. Patrick "king of abortion" Tomlinson saying an unborn child is living? These days if you so much as implied that a fetus is a living person, Patrick would scoff at you and call you an ignorant bigot. "It's just a clump of cells, child"

But if she heard any of it, she didn’t care. She told me that she had never loved me, had never been attracted to me, didn’t respect me, and didn’t trust me.  It was a lie, of course. A lie she told to me, but more importantly to herself. A lie she continues to tell herself to this day.

Here Patrick refuses that the mother of his child doesn't love him. He's so arrogant and full of himself that he insists she does love him. Despite the fact she is divorcing him while still pregnant with his child. Patrick decides to refuse the reality of the situation in favor of believing his bullshit version of the story. In his eyes, he was the perfect husband and never did a single thing wrong.

But at the time, I couldn’t recognize it. I was, simply put, destroyed. It was like being unmade, almost murdered. I cried uncontrollably everyday for weeks. I didn’t have a full night’s sleep for seventy days before I lost count. I ate so little that I lost twenty pounds, and if it wasn’t for the rivers of beer I drank to numb the world, I would have lost even more.

It seems getting into cuckolding was a mistake, huh Patrick? Your newly empowered wife realized she could do way better than a fat failed author/comedian that spends his time arguing on Twitter, that is, when he isn't drunkenly playing with his star wars toys. But now that the house is empty he can do that a whole lot more.

This is when my monster came back from its exile and pounced. Somehow, I managed to continue on auto-pilot, paying my bills and working, but at every moment the monster sapped my energy. It left me mentally and physically exhausted, yet unable to sleep and recover. Alcohol and sleep medication was all that kept it at bay for a few hours at a time and let me rest.

Yep, you read that right. Instead of trying to get a lawyer involved, or fighting for his marriage or child at all, Patrick seeks to resolve his problems by abusing alcohol and benzodiazepines and feeling sorry for himself. At this point, I almost feel sorry for him too. A man has lost his own wife and child for no reason. Absolutely no reason what so ever.

This is probably one of the major events in Patricks life that made him into what he is today: A bitter, woman hating misanthrope. Some time afterwards, he decided that the unborn are not living things and that everyone who disagrees with him is literally a nazi.