Like staring at the Mona Lisa only I wouldn't fuck this one.

The Mona Lisa was a guy.

Exactly.

Yeah. I mean, I'd rather be molested by Mick Foley than have sex with Amy Schumer.

Oddly specific

He looks like a rapist.

That’s his bit

Mick Foley would never molest you. He is a good guy.

Amy schumer would molest you. She’s a bad person.

And if Mrs Foley's baby boy ever did such heinous act, he'd at least have the curtesy of wearing a sock.

Mankind, Dude Love, or Cactus Jack?

Yes.

Because of his immense size I feel like Mankind would be the most gentle and loving

Dude love seems like he’d take his time and make you feel like you’re wanted. Mankind on the other hand would be very awkward and would most likely cry at some point during. Cactus jack would just jackhammer your bung into steakums I’d assume

Maybe that is the point of Amy Schumer. Population control. To turn all heterosexual males gay.

Mick Foley would never do such a thing. Socko on the other hand...

"In an act of bravery, Amy Schumer eats own child" - some Buzzfeed article, written by some faggot.

Bitch only caught one red light on the way home from the hospital.

She was doing a Republican character while she did so, bravely showing how they are eating the children's future with climate change.

"Why I'm Okay with Amy Schumer's Infanticide"

".... and here's why that's a good thing!"

"Amy Schumer posted a picture where she's gnawing on the bones of her child and it's just everything!"

"In an act of bravery, Amy Schumer eats own child" - some Buzzfeed article, written by some faggot.

it's because she gave birth to a white male.

would it be murder in the classical sense? The baby is rumored to be a human-pig hybrid. Killing it (and the mother) might be ethical even.

I thought it was taco meat with onion and shredded cheese.

You're not Carson, faggot. Who are these "folks"?

That's how old people get away with calling everyone Fucks.

Either she eats it or will have to endure at least a decade of social media posts about every zany things the little fucker does.

Normal moms become the most insufferable narcissists with the social media upon having a new child, imagine an already insufferable narcissist. What ungodly demon is about to be unleashed upon us!

I know it came from Amy but there's no way it has that kind of meat on it yet.

LOVE red onion.

ever carmelize them?

You soung like a regal gentleman that does not fuck with chicken tendies

What the fuck is a goddamn tendy? Chickens have feet and tits. If you aint eating a foot or a tit, you might be a fag, boy. Check yer seat.

You eat shit for breakfast?

Yes.

See you tomorrow morning.

No, her husband is a chef. He's going to make a nice baby souffle for piggy to eat

Such a massive, dirty bitch of a hate filled land whale.

Big Amy's chili dog habit puts Sonic to shame.

The oatmeal speckled skin really sells it.