Fatrick is supposedly a professional writer who prides himself on crafting believable characters with unique personalities. Yet, he complimented his own wife while pretending to pull off some Blackkklansman inspired undercover sleuthing. This guy has zero self control.
He deleted the comment about his wife. Just that one, though. u/ApartReference, did you figure out that one might have given you away? Why the fuck are you even hiding, were you doing your hourly browsing of the sub with this account and you just couldn't read all that criticism without chiming in anymore?
The sad thing is, this is the most honest defense of yourself I've seen so far, without the bullshit dismissive snark or the same 5 stock lines you always use, you actually were defending yourself as yourself instead of the character that you've created that is Fatrick S. Tomlinson... and you had to do it incognito. Everything about you is so contrived, the only sincerity you're capable of is when you're speaking from a throwaway account. What an insecure little man must be hiding beneath all that manufactured bravado. I'm sure Adrienne knows.
Out of all the things in Fatrick's life, landing Adrienne is the only actual impressive thing he's ever done. Apparently, she had remarkably low self esteem at one point. Thank Christ someone came along and saved her.
She probably had a bad sexual experience as a teenager and it shot her self-confidence. Along waddled Patrick, like an insecurity vampire, and managed to manipulate and guilt-trip her into a relationship. But of course, he never even came close to making her cum.
Eventually her knight with a bulge in his shining armour came along and bust her open. The first time her body tensed up before flooding into orgasm she thought she was going to pass out. She never knew sex was supposed to be like that. After so many awful experiences with Patrick's doughy body rutting on top of her, like a dying fish flapping around on the floor of a boat, she'd almost given up hope of ever cumming. Really cumming. Enter Jonathan. She thought she was going to literally piss herself the first time his fat pole parted her, but instead she learned that day that she was a squirter.
God bless her bruised vagina and freshly fucked glow, and God bless Jonathan's magical mule.
Quite frankly, we've been absolute gentlemen (and one lady). Yeah, we imply that this wife of a public figure is no prize, but so far that I'm aware, we've done nothing to pester her. She'd likely be blissfully unaware if Fatrick didn't feel the need to tell everyone and their mother who we are.
31 comments
1 RoliMosimann 2019-04-25
Wow, how did that one slip past this till now? He's about as smooth it blending in as Joe.
1 stealthygeek 2019-04-25
Fatrick is supposedly a professional writer who prides himself on crafting believable characters with unique personalities. Yet, he complimented his own wife while pretending to pull off some Blackkklansman inspired undercover sleuthing. This guy has zero self control.
1 RoliMosimann 2019-04-25
He deleted the comment about his wife. Just that one, though. u/ApartReference, did you figure out that one might have given you away? Why the fuck are you even hiding, were you doing your hourly browsing of the sub with this account and you just couldn't read all that criticism without chiming in anymore?
The sad thing is, this is the most honest defense of yourself I've seen so far, without the bullshit dismissive snark or the same 5 stock lines you always use, you actually were defending yourself as yourself instead of the character that you've created that is Fatrick S. Tomlinson... and you had to do it incognito. Everything about you is so contrived, the only sincerity you're capable of is when you're speaking from a throwaway account. What an insecure little man must be hiding beneath all that manufactured bravado. I'm sure Adrienne knows.
1 Phantas_Magorical 2019-04-25
God damn
1 harriswill 2019-04-25
Ribs
1 OutlawMemer 2019-04-25
Your first wife was a goddess of sublime beauty, this new frump you're shacking up and living in sin with is a Long Island 3.
1 RoliMosimann 2019-04-25
Out of all the things in Fatrick's life, landing Adrienne is the only actual impressive thing he's ever done. Apparently, she had remarkably low self esteem at one point. Thank Christ someone came along and saved her.
1 McGowan9 2019-04-25
Saved her and made her pussy speak in tongues.
She probably had a bad sexual experience as a teenager and it shot her self-confidence. Along waddled Patrick, like an insecurity vampire, and managed to manipulate and guilt-trip her into a relationship. But of course, he never even came close to making her cum.
Eventually her knight with a bulge in his shining armour came along and bust her open. The first time her body tensed up before flooding into orgasm she thought she was going to pass out. She never knew sex was supposed to be like that. After so many awful experiences with Patrick's doughy body rutting on top of her, like a dying fish flapping around on the floor of a boat, she'd almost given up hope of ever cumming. Really cumming. Enter Jonathan. She thought she was going to literally piss herself the first time his fat pole parted her, but instead she learned that day that she was a squirter.
God bless her bruised vagina and freshly fucked glow, and God bless Jonathan's magical mule.
1 OutlawMemer 2019-04-25
There is more brilliant, compelling writing about Fatrick than there ever will be by him.
1 GTAThrowaway9876 2019-04-25
I mean, bravissimo
1 SpunkAlarm 2019-04-25
Reading that made my dick move
1 MonsignorScurrility 2019-04-25
He deleted that one.
1 scott__the__dick 2019-04-25
I mean she was okay
1 Twatsmash 2019-04-25
Do the bit
1 Twatsmash 2019-04-25
Do the bit.
1 OkaySeriouslyBro 2019-04-25
u/ApartReference my friend
Mind telling me what you'd like to do to Patrick's cute wife if you could?
Would you drive a man's motorcycle and not be a whiny alcoholic manbaby? Cause I'm telling you dude, taking a chick from Patrick is fucking E-A-S-Y.
1 MonsignorScurrility 2019-04-25
He deleted the cute wife one. Bahahaha.
1 scott__the__dick 2019-04-25
It's funny he thought that was the one that gave it away, not that anyone would defend him on the internet
1 peeperpooperlollypop 2019-04-25
I can’t wait until his new girl replaces him due to his internet obsession. Hahaha bloated alcoholic faced retard
1 WillyCosby 2019-04-25
I'm sure she's thrilled about him involving her in all this.
1 RoliMosimann 2019-04-25
Quite frankly, we've been absolute gentlemen (and one lady). Yeah, we imply that this wife of a public figure is no prize, but so far that I'm aware, we've done nothing to pester her. She'd likely be blissfully unaware if Fatrick didn't feel the need to tell everyone and their mother who we are.
1 throwawawyy2 2019-04-25
Idk might be one of his superfans
1 Twatsmash 2019-04-25
Oh of course, one of his hundreds of thousands of fans.
1 StarbuckAndCasey 2019-04-25
Fawkin' busted!
1 RacistPigeon 2019-04-25
Using the same line of thinking as ichise8
1 Fatty_Pneumonia 2019-04-25
/u/ApartReference is that you Fatrick, or is your wife ghost writing your reddit comments for you, too?
1 faggotherelistenup 2019-04-25
Oh child...
1 [deleted] 2019-04-25
[removed]
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1 GinFoss 2019-04-25
How many times has /u/apartreference had to reach for that backspace key after reflexively typing "little one" or "child"
"Oh shit can't make this too obvious...."
1 Xtaline 2019-04-25
Dude it's clearly not him. The username isn't his name, I mean duh it couldn't possibly be him.