Jim & Sam Report for 7/25/19

59  2019-07-25 by SpaceEdgesDom

Show opens with something gay and unfunny

Some cunt is in studio. I think she used to be a comedian. She says nothing funny or even interesting.

Jimmy is late probably. I don't blame him though. What sort of me me me sssscuuumbag would expect their show host to show up on time anyway?

Worm finally shows up with a boring story about his boring life. Sam lisps his way through an ironic question hehehehe. He's wearing a Nikki Bella shirt and clown shoes. He's just the worst. Jim responds literally because he has an IQ of 75.

Sam asks Jim if he watched WWE Raw last night. He did not. So he didn't hehehehe. Sam does a breakdown of Raw because this is basically a pro rasslin show at this point. Jim is on his phone pretending to have a busy life.

Bonnie McFarlane in studio. She is bad at comedy and just being a woman in general. They discuss the same things they've discussed for the last 15 years they've known one another. Rich Vos sure does have tiny hands doesn't he? ehehehehe

The moment you've all been waiting for - political talk! The g-g-g-g-girls run down the week's big events. They know nothing. It is astounding. I forgot to mention that they already have a dozen commercial breaks because Jimmy had to go pee pee HAHAHAHAHA!!!!! I want to die.

Political talk from the dumbest human beings on earth continues. This may actually be what Hell is like. Bonnie forces everyone to compliment her on her disgusting, smelly vagina. Jim likes a MEATY vagina HAHAHAHAHA! WHAT A CARD! I think this political talk only lasts 5 minutes but it feels like hours.

Bonnie has a new comedy special coming out where she tells zero jokes and just accuses various men in the audience of being rapists. The Guardian calls it "Just everything!"

Sam has no personality, so he just keeps on with the irony. Sam tells a story of how he just bought the newest Yeezy Air Jordan X-Force X-Treme Lit AF Nikes for $12,000. He is stupid and I wish he was dead.

Sam brings in a new intern. This intern is wearing brown pants so Sam calls him "Brown Pants" hehehehehe. This segment goes an hour and 35 minutes. The intern is a totally normal human just trying to get radio experience and has never heard of Jim & Sam.

The show ends with...whatever the fuck the show usually ends with. They threaten the audience that they will be back tomorrow with an appearance from Mary Jean. You may recognize her as the person with the weird face from Midsommar. Stay tuned, assholes!

26 comments

1  Magicmetalknight 2019-07-25

I’m sure this thread is a million times more entertaining than Jim and Sam have ever been. Can’t say for sure though because I’ve never listened.

1  SirSodomy 2019-07-25

I just want to thank you and all the other people who listen to all this horrible post-O&A shit so we don’t have to.

Quite frankly if it were up to me, we would have no new things to hate about Jim/Sam/Nana because I can’t force myself to listen to them

1  SpaceEdgesDom 2019-07-25

I've listened to maybe 3 minutes total of Jim & Sam. I just assume this is how the show goes.

1  Phantas_Magorical 2019-07-25

Yeah I thought that fat asshole Stav was on

1  -AnonymousDouche 2019-07-25

I assume this is completely indistinguishable from every fucking episode.

1  Rich_Vos_Rolex 2019-07-25

OP https://www.nfsa.gov.au/sites/default/files/styles/img2x992x0/public/screenings/asset02-2018/clockwork-orange_1600x775.jpg?itok=8kwMNp1p&timestamp=1518062629

1  JoeCumiasFryingPan 2019-07-25

Out for a bit of the ol' ultraboredom

1  Seize_The_Chilidog 2019-07-25

It annoys me that this is Jim’s favorite movie but you know he absorbed none of its messages and feels no genuine emotions while watching it.

He’s like Bobo. He’s fanatically devoted to a thing but doesn’t understand why.

1  Pud_Suckley 2019-07-25

It was his favorite movie until Crash.

1  [deleted] 2019-07-25

[removed]

1  TheElDan 2019-07-25

I doubt he even saw it, he picked up the broad strokes from other comedians talking about it, realized there was a rape scene, and decided it was his favorite movie because he’s fuckin dark, man.

1  JoeCumiasFryingPan 2019-07-25

"they threaten the audience that they will be back tomorrow" really got me good

1  chex_and_texlemeneux 2019-07-25

Probably better than the real thing too.

1  i_saw_nothing 2019-07-25

Beautifully done in that this could be parody... this could actually have been the Jim & Sam Show this, or any other morning.

1  Separate_Possibility 2019-07-25

I enjoyed that. Could you change cunt to hole?

1  SpaceEdgesDom 2019-07-25

I won't change my art just to appease the audience, maaaan.

1  Skip4play 2019-07-25

Lol, $12k for some shoes

1  literalotherkin 2019-07-25

You're doing the Lord's work. Just feeling masochistic or are you being tortured by an ingenious prison guard?

1  mvcv114 2019-07-25

Teeeee Heeeeeee. Teeeeee Heeeeeee.

1  Mikekekeke 2019-07-25

Remember when Sam tried to claim at the beginning that they were talking about wrestling and had a lot of wrestlers in because those were just the guys that were in town at the time? hehehehehe

1  throwawawyy2 2019-07-25

The pure hatred seeping off this got my ribs good

1  TheElDan 2019-07-25

They discuss the same things they've discussed for the last 15 years they've known one another.

This pretty much sums it up, doesn’t it? Colin is the only one trying to do something new with himself and coincidentally the only non-loser of the bunch.

1  CurrentComment 2019-07-25

Did you listen to a re-run to do a rundown?

1  packitchofsositch 2019-07-25

The sub has passed you by.

1  CurrentComment 2019-07-25

Oh I see. I goofed.

1  D0WhatN0w 2019-07-25

The only thing missing was Travis and troy making out for 10 min for Jim's pleasure then mocking brown pants to fit in with jim and sam