Cis broad eh, no penis?

Wormy cocksucker was expecting to toss a salad, ohhhhhhhhhhhh

That is just indescribably sad. It really calls into question all of the worm's stories about sweet talking normal women and non-whore masseuses into doing degrading sexual shit with him; surely a man capable of such charm and possessing such a nuanced understanding of women could not possibly be so densely retarded as to bring a little single size snacky snack to what is clearly an invite to fuck.

It really calls into question all of the worm's stories about sweet talking normal women and non-whore masseuses into doing degrading sexual shit with him;

I imagine none of the women (/men) Jim has claimed to have fucked and done dirty things with are anything someone would call fuckable. Listening to some of the stories Jim and Rich used to talk about together are clearly made up "fer de shooow" or embellished so much that they somehow turn a story about how they took turns on a dirty bar stool to how all three were sitting on a bed together while Jim and Rich jerked off and Rich later puked because of a dirty cat box.

fer de shooow

awroight

Jim has probably never fucked a normal woman. Anyone he could talk into sleeping with him has to be mentally ill or unnatractive in some way.

Like Chelsea Perretti, quite possibly the ugliest female TV star working today. She literally makes my stomach turn.

I doubt he fucked her as ugly as she is its the worm we are talking about here.

surely a man capable of such charm and possessing such a nuanced understanding of women could not possibly be so densely retarded as to bring a little single size snacky snack to what is clearly an invite to fuck.

You're talking about a dude who's been on, what, eight dates in his life? If that?

95% of his sexual encounters were with whores.

Is there a link to the worm telling this story? Or is this some faggy fam fiction?

But what happened to the salad?

https://youtu.be/gMPG7jy6qLg

Yeah, why provide a timestamp when you can subject everyone to an extra six minutes of Jimmy Four Chins and Sammy Buckteeth.

Cruel and unusual punishment. But thanks for the link nonetheless.

Tss He's got more chins than a Chinese phonebook or somethin'.

Thanks for the link

was this the starbucks employee?

Bold strategy to be pushing 50 and going on Tinder

I've told this story a million times, but here goes:

I used to have a job where I did nearly no work. I would message girls on dating sites for about two or three hours every day, five days a week. Once in a blue moon I'd get a date with a Five or a Six.

One Monday afternoon, a girl who's an Eight is super eager to meet me, like TODAY, right now.

I figure I'm being catfished, but I couldn't resist.

I meet up with her in person, and she's actually hotter than her pictures. She's a solid eight, maybe a nine. We're drinking at the bar for an hour, and I figure that's gonna be it. (My self esteem kinda sucks.) Lo and behold, she invites me back to her place. I don't think that's ever happened in my entire life.

We go back, and have sex, and I can tell she's kinda disgusted by the whole thing. I get the distinct vibe I'll never see her again. So I ask for a second round. I can't get my dick hard right away, so I start going down on her and fingering her. First with one finger, and then with two. Then she says the words I will never ever forget:

Go ahead and put the whole thing in.

So I do. I fist this girl. On the first fucking date. It was weird as fuck, it was like her entire vagina dilated, like she was giving birth or something. This was clearly something she'd done before. She was so wet, it was like a puddle.

Never saw her ever again. She called me the next day in a panic, and basically explained that she was getting back with her boyfriend.

My guess is that he pissed her off so she went looking for the first person who'd show up and fuck her, and I won that lottery.

The Outlier- sounds like a super hero.

Why would you expect to get laid when you're the gay friend a woman can invite and hang out with like one of the girls?

This is exactly what happened, the same way girls invite each other over to sit on different couches on their laptops with the TV in the background, occasionally talk every ten mins or so, and send each other tumblr memes, Jim was being groomed

Don't forget he also purposely left her door ajar as a motherfuck to her. He was hoping she'd be raped and killed for daring to disrespect him like that.

Or catch a draft...a slow motherfucking.

I'd rather take the rape than catch a draft

Having to spend any time with the Worm is like having your soul raped.

Then she'd say "Hold on ....", close the door, get the hat, then shove her armthrough the door like Gloria giving Felix his frying pan in the "Odd Couple" opening.

Didn't he also leave a large fluffy hat under a pillow on her couch so he'd have a reason to go back to her apartment and force an interaction?

He yearned for her

Probably. I can't bring myself to listen to 20 minutes of it again to find out.

Way to miss the Seinfeld reference

Was it a sable hat by chance?

🎶 Jim Nor-ton

I heard he also stole her clock.

Then she'd say "Hold on ....", close the door, get the hat, then shove her armthrough the door like Gloria giving Felix his frying pan in the "Odd Couple" opening.

She tossed the next guys salad, while Norton went home and tossed his salad in the trash.

not just headlines....but BETTER...headlines...

You know he tossed it into he trash angrily and ate a big bowl of ice cream

Listen to the opening of today’s show (I know it’s awful). They were discussing a party Jim is throwing at his house. The complete social ineptness of Norton is astounding. I don’t understand how he functions in day to day life.

No

Just have a Budweiser before you go round faggot. You may act like a normal person for once in your pathetic miserable life.

He can't, Jim is liable to raze an entire city block to the ground if he drinks 1 beer

Does anyone remember which subreddit it was where someone from here posted the exact story as if it was their own and people there made fun of him? I might be able to find the post if anyone knows the sub.

He posted it so the people there would make fun of Jim without knowing who it was. He wasn't trying to steal Jim's brilliant story lol.

"But then again, we made out for 40 minutes."
After she slurped up tinder guys cum.

Yeah that's probably what happened and she thought it would be funny to make out with cuck boy afterward. That would have just turned Jim on though, the gay little retard.

I posted it here

It was some kind of "am I doing this dating thing right, gang?" sub. I think it go deleted pretty quickly sadly. People were hating his leaving the door ajar to motherfuck her part in the replies.

I posted it after it was deleted on the OG sub but of course I cant see my own fucking comments on this shitdick website after a sub goes private. I can find it when I get home though.

I posted it here

He doesn't like food, alcohol or drugs. He isn't into any popular culture stuff other than a few 1970s rock bands. He doesn't travel for fun or go anywhere interesting. He's spent twenty years describing his freakish sexual fetishes. He takes anti-AIDS pills. He dresses in concert tees and sweatshirts. He looks like a malnourished cancer patient. There's not a lot there to attract ANY woman, much less hot ones in their 20s.

Yeah but he does a mean Henry Fonda joke!

I've heard meaner

I'm fucking dead he better not have brought a salad and almonds

Sad to me

This is....it just. it can't be. Cmon.... Please send me a link to where this story is referenced?

What a flashback. This story was right around the exact time I just couldn’t handle listening to the show anymore and stopped completely.

Reminds me exactly of the best friend of my ex girlfriend. Mid 20’s and mildy attractive. She had ADHD and needed constant attention so would invite older pathetic middle aged guys she met in bars, UPS guys, other neighbours, random store owners, etc over all the time just to hang out and give her attention with no intention of fucking them. They would literally sit in her apartment for hours at time listening to all her bullshit then go home blue balled.

How sad Norton tries to make out he’s some sort of magnanimous hero by politely excusing himself when he was just an ugly old creep who didn’t get the hint then passive aggressively left the door open.

i listened to the clip, chum. your facts are off, pal. this seems to be the case quite frequently on this sub. the fella went out with the ladys friend, but the main lady stayed home. norton went back to her home and as he says, "made out with her". heres the clip! https://youtu.be/gMPG7jy6qLg?t=1379

norton wins again, folks! also, opie is a coprophilic pedophile

It is much more likely that Ops rendition of facts occured over Norton's delusions.

Hey, lawyerherelistenup, just a quick heads-up:
occured is actually spelled occurred. You can remember it by two cs, two rs.
Have a nice day!

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this guys gets it

this isnt a bit, pal. im simply spreading truth. know what im sayin?

also, opie is a coprophilic pedophile

The salad in the bowl is gay as fuck but seriously, what balls on the girl to invite a random other tinder guy in the middle of a date. She’s marriage material.

I heard she put red wine dressing on it

He's such a cuck